Love is a shop-soiled word. To say that it is an overused word is to state an obvious fact. Over the centuries, poets, philosophers, dramatists, and novelists have produced works, whose thematic concern is love. Daily, young people whisper sweet-nothings into the ears of their friends in demonstration of their love. Religious teachers do exhort member of their religious groups to love other people. In addition, the bible, which is the holy book of the Christians, says a person who loves his neighbour has fulfilled the commandments.
Nevertheless, to some people, love is an undefinable and indefinable emotion. One definition cannot encapsulate and capture vividly the meaning(s) of love. Love can be broadly divided into many groups, chief among them are agape love and Eros. However, what is love?
The Longman’s dictionary of contemporary English defines love as ’’ a strong feeling of caring about someone especially a member of you family. A strong feeling of liking and caring about someone especially combined with sexual attraction”. However, do the diverse people(s) of the world engage in deeds of love? The answer is a categorical no. Millions of people(s) who belong to different human races are without love. So, from Syria to Israel; From Nigeria to Chad, terrorist groups, whose members are indoctrinated with dangerous religious dogmas are engaged in orgy of killings. The members of Boko Haram, Isis, El- shabab and others kill other people in the name of the Koran.
No religion preaches violence and bloodshed. So those who kill other people on behalf of their God or gods are violating the tenets of their faiths. The world’s religions have doctrines that are rooted in love. In Nigeria, almost everybody belongs to a religious group. Islam and Christianity, which displaced and dethroned the African traditional religion, are the predominant ones.
In addition, adherents of the major religions in Nigeria, who occupy position in the top echelon of our super-structure, perpetrate deeds that hurt our economy. Consequently, Nigeria is bedeviled with the problem of high-rate of unemployment. But a God- fearing man with probity will not divert public money entrusted in his care into his private account .A person, who is truly righteous and forthright, will not demand monetary inducement from job -seekers. The down –trodden, are denied those places owing to Nigeria egregious systems of doing things.
And it is not love that motivates some people to abduct and kill children for moneymaking rituals.
Love is a scarce commodity among us now. Moreover, the existence of love among us is prerequisite for our entrenchment of peace and unity in Nigeria. If love exists among every family, then Nigeria will become an oasis of peace and unity. However, we have many broken homes and families in Nigeria as marriages collapse as fast as amoebae cells break up. When a marriage union is destitute of love, it will fail.
In African, especially Nigeria, men marry wives in order to beget male children, who will ensure that their families’ names do not go into extinction. In addition, men prefer male children to female ones as girls are thought to be chattels that will be sold off. A woman without a male child is always unhappy. Some so –called well -educated men ended their marriage unions on grounds that their wives could not begot male children.
More so, some people enter into marriage relationships because marriage confers a measure of respectability. In Nigeria, marriage is a yardstick for assessing people’s successes. Therefore, not many people have entered into the sacred union and institution of marriage for love. Yet, any human relationships not based on love are predisposed to fail. Do we not put up with the irritating, offensive and repulsive deeds of those for whom we profess love? Some husbands had their kidneys harvested, which they donated to their wives for organ transplant, as their wives’ kidneys were diseased. Men and women who are propelled by feelings of love do make great sacrifices in order to give joy to their partners. Any marriage union that is founded on genuine love can resist the buffeting and whiplash of marital troubles.
Being married has compelled me to learn the virtues of patience and tolerance. They are the qualities of love. The holy bible tells us that love covers a multitude of sins. As we journey to the altar for the solemnization of our marriage union, I pray that our two souls should unite as inseparable Siamese twins, and continue to chime the same tunes.
Chiedu is a civil servant, writer and a patriotic Nigerian, based in Anambra.
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